First things first is a post I've been trying to write for a while because it's so hard to put my thoughts into words.
Everyone says, "You don't know until you hold your baby just how special being a mom is." While I definitely agree with this, I think it's more than that. I was certain I would be overwhelmingly in love with my baby when he was born- the big thing that surprised me was how much I loved him so specifically. It's really hard to explain, but I'll do my best.
I always think babies are adorable. I know that each small baby is different but part of me, I think, still always kind of grouped newborns into a very similar category. How different could they really be? I was really surprised by how much I was attached to the cute little face he would make as he woke up or the way he yawned. If, in some bizarre universe, the nurse had said that I wasn't holding the right baby, I would have been heartbroken to hand him back over for another. Even if she were to tell me she had my actual baby in her arms.
I am still blown away every day that I'm a mom, married to a dad and that I have a little BOY! I could not love him more and it's the best feeling in the world. I am very focused on enjoying every minute of being home with him in his first year- especially those challenging moments. I know there may be days I long to hold and feed him again and I want to make sure to take it all in.
I love my boys.
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| Photo by Matt and Chera Yorke |
